So I haven’t been writing much lately, as I’ve been busy, wanting to get other things done and get to bed on time. But I think I would like to at least write one small reflective thought each day. So I will start here in this post, and then every day I will write my new thought/reflection as a comment.
I have been really struggling with Mr7 and his continuous melt downs… I’m loosing confidence as I wonder where I went wrong (and if it is simply a reflection of me not being able to manage my emotions), and I struggle to maintain calm and in control when these intense melt downs just go on and on and I can’t seem to reason with him. Calm but firm guidance is met with angry retaliation. It is at times like these that I feel like a complete failure. A broken marriage (that should never have happened in the first place) which resulted in two kids who I apparently am not capable of parenting.
But today my feeling was a bit different. Today I felt more ready to embrace the challenge. I have to accept that this is the stage that we are at right now, and embrace it. (I read some advice like this in a relationship self help book once. I will provide details when I find the book.) My life is a story, and in this part of the story my son is really struggling to deal with his emotions…. what happens next, is up to me. I need to embrace and love the stages of the story of my life. Perhaps this is the part where a brave mother steps in and acknowledges her own weaknesses and strives to overcome them and lovingly guides her son to do the same. (Please excuse the excessive corniness)
I read a post by 1awesome Dad today which is perhaps what sparked my more positive attitude. In his post he states that the following is the single most important parenting strategy ever, in every situation:
You have to become the most loving, caring, passionate, joyful, enthusiastic, understanding, appreciating and adoring parent/person that you possibly can be.
As the writer said, you just can’t argue with that can you?
This post is turning out to be a lot longer than I had planned and I am running out of chill time…
But there is one more thing I wanted to say.
Today, I just decided to say no to ridiculous and unnecessary anxiety. Yesterday, I wasted so much time stressing about whether or not I should be out shopping with my sister, or at home getting stuff done. It’s just ridiculous, I’m wasting precious time when I could be recharging, living and loving my life. Enough is enough. I don’t want to be that person. I need to just put things into perspective. And get over myself! Go with the flow, and make the most of what ever situation I’m in, or decision I have made. These teeny tiny things I’m stressing about aren’t going to negatively impact the world, or even my life in the long term. So. That’s it. I’m kicking (stupidly unnecessary) anxiety out of my life.
And with that I will end my not so brief parenting reflection. Maybe I’ll be briefer tomorrow.